Lest the Europeans accuse us of being boring or the Arabs accuse us of being fundamentally moderate, the Polygamists, a Mormon sect that’s as American as apple pie, are in the news again. This time not because one of their buggy-eyed leaders has been arrested, but because their women and children have been taken from them–a demographic which, not surprisingly, outnumbers their men greatly. As I’ve said before, in terms of the American Freakshow, Mormon polygamists are second to me, topped only by the Appalachian snake dancers in providing fun and amusement.
However, I do also love the pontificating by both the ‘mainstream’ Mormon church and the ‘mainstream’ leaders of every other religion practiced across this land. “What crazies!” they tell the hosts and pundits on cable news and daytime radio hosts, “Those people are truly mad!” they claim with a gleam of self-satisfaction in their eyes. Now, to be sure, anyone who engages in sexual relations with an underage boy or girl should be put in jail. But, if that’s all they’re being accused of then their madness is no madder than that of the Catholic Church. Furthermore, it should be noted that many Polygamist sects are not known to practice either underage marriages or arraigned marriages and whose communities are built on consent, but still they’re harassed and painted as psychotics. No, what we, the government, the LDS, the Evangelicals, and the Media are accusing these people of is being crazy. I’m all for that, but what is crazy?
Is it insane to believe that G-d wants you to take several wives? Sure, but not more insane than to believe your sole wife was fashioned from a rib. When Mitt Romney was running for President, Protestant leaders kept warning us of the insane Mormons, spinning tales of Magic Underwear and Jesus’ visits to North America. Are those things crazy? They’re fucking nuts! But not crazier than a virgin birth or a resurrection. It’s just as ridiculous for Scientologists to believe they’re being healed by a space-creature than for us Jews to believe all six-billion human beings, of different ethnicities and languages, came from two.
Not to repeat myself, but I’m all for banning polygamous marriages because they’re marriages, but if we’re going to have this stupid institution let’s let all combinations and sexes participate in its stupidity. And if we’re going to start preaching logic and reason in the public square let’s let all levels of madness be its victim.
Have you considered Subscribing to all of this madness?
